Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. 

I have to be honest, I have grown weary of this prayer. 

The serenity prayer was written by American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr. Its earliest recorded reference to the prayer is in a diary entry in 1932. In early 1942 it was noticed by Bill W. In AA in an obituary and grew in popularity with the organization and several others over the years. 

For years I have been hearing this prayer quoted in all types of circumstances. Every recovery program I have been involved with used this. It is quoted to give comfort to those who are hurting and those needing encouragement. It has become a standard poem for people searching for something to say in uncomfortable grief moments. I have seen it printed on mugs, wall hangings, pendants, blankets, coasters, cards, journals, and countless other items. In my opinion, it is overused. 

How much comfort can one get from an overused prayer? If it is so repetitious and can be quoted from memory, how does the meaning get across? How much comfort does it really provide? Maybe my problem is I have heard it so many times I have forgotten what it can mean for those needing comfort, including myself. 

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change:  This is a major hang up for me. I feel the need to be in control of most things and I am always hesitant to admit I am powerless in a situation. I cannot change people. I cannot change my past. I cannot change the fact I was sexually abused. I cannot change the fact I have an addiction. I cannot make God fit into my plan. God has always had a plan for my life and so much of it is unknown. I have to be okay and comforted by this. I cannot change God, but he can change me. 

To change the things I can: Accepting what I can change is difficult also. To change anything about myself is to admit I am not fine the way I am. For the most part, the only thing I can change, with God’s help, is myself. There has to be a different future based on choices I make. Healing from the abuse is part of my future. By taking the steps forward I have no option but to change; the changes are a choice.

If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. James 1:5

Wisdom to know the difference: This is where it gets tricky. Wisdom can all be linked to control. I have to take a step back and allow logic to make a decision rather than emotion. The wisdom is in the pause, a pause I fail to take more often than I would like. I can learn to take a breath before reacting but cannot do it regularly without divine help. How does this wisdom come about? Prayer and meditation in God’s word. By consistently being in God’s word and regular prayer, the pause will become more of the norm, second nature if you will. There will be times, of course, my knee-jerk reaction will kick in and the wisdom will come afterward. It’s human nature. It takes a divine nature to interrupt foolishness and gather wisdom. 

The Serenity Prayer could be an irritation because I see a truth in it I am unwilling to face.